Breaking Up is Never Mutual

I have often heard people say that when they broke up, it was a mutual decision. But is it really?

What happens when people decide that they want to end the relationship? Some say they have irreconcilable differences..others claim to have felt tired or unhappy..or felt the relationship isn’t going anywhere — and then soon enough, ask for their respective “freedom.” But honestly, do both parties feel the same — that is, deciding to end the relationship?

I have yet to be convinced that this is indeed mutual. I have been guilty of using this line of reasoning as well. And I admit, it wasn’t. Oh but I wish it were. I asked for the break up because I thought it was the right thing to do. Even if it killed me. And pretended we both needed it..perhaps..but I didn’t feel the need, not as much as he did.

They say it’s a brave thing — letting go of someone you love. But bravery may just be a front..a guise to help both parties get through the break up. As I have asked before, is love not enough? If it were, why can’t it sustain a relationship?

They say relationships are entirely different from love. And so it seems that love may or may not be even remotely connected to relationships. And if this is so, when a relationship ceases to exist, love is never to be blamed..not even as a scapegoat. So if you want it to end, don’t pretend that you both want it to happen..because no one can ever tell what is best for somebody else. And if you are on the receiving end of this heartbreaking truth, do not accept the reason that it is best for you too, if you feel you don’t.

Is it really worth the lie, if the truth shall cost your life in exchange for someone else’s freedom? And ultimately, are you really set free when deep down inside, you know you will forever be bound to that one person you will never get to have for keeps?

**very old entry. .reposting it for a friend..**


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